Dee's Blog Bit

In 6 days, it'll be a year since I found a lump in my left boob.  The lump that turned out to be cancerous.. the lump that changed my whole life.

I often wish SO much that my nice new relationship with James, wasn't tainted by this stupid cancer thing.  I imagine wha it would be like, to not have to worry about that, and to just be able to have a 'normal' relationship, with 'normal' worries.

On 19th July 2005, I had this lump surgically removed, using what some call a Wide Local Excision.. others call a Lumpectomy, and yet more others call Breast conserving surgery.
Either way, this means they removed the lump and a 'margin' of tissue around it, whilst still leaving me with the rest of my boob intact.

At this time, I was advised by my surgeon to consider having a mastectomy (entire boob removal), due to the aggressivness of the cancer, and the fact that some rogue cancer cells had managed to escape into my blood stream.
However, two oncologists (cancer doctors.. one being one of the leading guys in the country) seemed to think that this approach was a little extreme, and said the lumpectomy should be adequate.
So I stayed as I was, with my boob still intact.

Since then, I found out that I was HER2 positive.  This generally gives a worse prognosis than being HER2 negative.
Fortunately, I'm now being treated with Herceptin, to try and improve my chances.

I'm now having serious doubts about the lumpectomy vs mastectomy thing.
I can't stop thinking that I should have opted for a mastectomy, which could decrease the chances of the cancer coming back in my boobs (seeing as there'd be virtually no breast tissue left).

I'm in a complete quandry about it now, and I have no idea what to do for the best.

But on a more positive note..
I'm Dee, and in 6 days time, I'll be a 1 year breast cancer survivor  :o)

The hair cut's been and gone, as has the Bon Jovi gig.

I like my new hair, though I still look back at photos of when it was long, and wonder if I'll get the chance to grow it that long again.
I used to love my long hair.  I took great care with it, and great pride in it.  I suppose it's sods law that it should all fall out.  Not much I can do about it though!

The Bon Jovi gig was good.  It took us an hour and a half, to get back to a hotel that was only 15 minutes away, afterwards though!
The drive back from Manchester, yesterday, was nice, even though I now have a sunburned nose!  James drove.. it was sunny and we had the roof down.. bliss!

I went to see Lisas kittens last night.
Her cat, Piu, has three week old babies.  A boy (Mylo) and a girl (Myrtle).  They're so cute, and funny.

It's sunny again today.  But I think I'll keep out of it.. my nose can't stand any more!
Dillon's been 'hanging out' around the back of the shed, with two other cats, for the past half an hour.  God knows what they're up to.. no good, I expect!

James went home an hour ago.  But he'll be back again on Friday evening.
I'm sure he's all that keeps me going through the week.  Especially the weeks I'm having treatment, seeing doctors, or having tests.
Everything'd be alot more daunting, if I didn't have the  weekends to look forward to.

He made me so proud yesterday (though he doesn't know it.. don't want to make his head swell!).
Lisa asked him about something.  I wasn't sure how he'd reply.. whether he'd tell the truth about it, or blag his way around it.  But he told the truth, and that struck something.  He kept commenting that I was all snuggly and lovey after that.  And he doesn't know that was the reason, but I felt so proud to be with someone who isn't ashamed of who they are, or what they've done.
He is who he is, and I love him for that.

In the midst of all this cancer crap, the best thing that's ever happened in my life, has come about.. Amazing.